As seen in the Dayton Daily News on November 7, 2015.
The clients I work with are often overwhelmed, stressed and depressed. There are multiple reasons why they are feeling this way, but a common cause I find is they are doing most of the tasks in their homes themselves, instead of assigning chores to their children.
They have not learned the art of delegating. A skill I learned a long time ago when the children we have outnumbered my husband and I.
One day I did the math. If I could get my children to do just one 15-minute task that I would normally do, I would gain one hour and 45 minutes a week per child.
This meant if I assigned just one 15-minute task to each of my five children, I would gain eights hours and 45 minutes to my week. This newfound time would allow me to do something fun with my kids, sneak off for a date with my husband, spend time on my business or check things off my to-do list.
And so the 15-minute chore chart was born. For one week, as I worked around my home, I wrote down any task I did that took 15 minutes or less to do.
Things like unloading the dishwasher, folding clothes from the dryer, collecting the household trash, vacuuming the living room and the many chores required to keep a home running smoothly.
With my new chore chart in hand, I watched for opportunities when my children needed something from me. I then assigned them a task from the 15-minute chart.
For example, when my child would ask me to drive them to a friend’s home, I would reply, “I would be happy to take you, but the dog needs brushed before we can go.”
Opportunities like this arose all the time; when they wanted money, needed a ride to the mall, wanted to invite a friend over, asked to watch a favorite program and when they got older, wanted to borrow the car.
They rarely complained about doing the assigned chores, because they were focused on how quickly they could get the task done to get their desire met.
Delegating to others requires you to give up control and let go of perfection. If you struggle with this, focus on what you are gaining by delegating, instead of how the chore gets done.
For instance, a client once asked me, “Does it bother you that your towels are not folded right?” I replied, “Delegating frees up time that I can spend doing things I enjoy. When I’m at book club laughing with my friends over a glass of wine, having poorly folded towels in my linen closet is not a real concern.”
I have never told my friends, “I would love to stay and visit longer, but I have to get home and straighten my towels.”
The next time your child needs something from you, smile and say “Sure, but first I need you to do a little something for me, then I’ll have time to help you with what you want.”
This system has worked so well for me that I wonder why should I stop there? I should create a spousal 15-minute chore chart and hope that it takes him awhile to catch on. I’ll keep you posted.